Jon Reisman

The cold snap (February made me shiver) and our next President’s ongoing efforts to vaccinate Florida from the woke virus inspired me (with apologies to Don McLean):

Long long time ago, I can still remember

How diversity used to make me smile

And I knew if I had my chance

That I could make those divas dance

And maybe they'd be happy for a while

But February made me shiver

With every lecture I'd deliver

Bad news on the laptop

Indoctrination had to stop

I can't remember if I cried

When the DEI divas lied

But something touched me deep inside

The day the quotas died

So bye-bye DEE EEE EYE

Drove my EV to the charger

But the charger was fried

Them good old indoctrinator lies

Singing, "Without DEI we’ll all die"

Without DEI we’ll all die

Did you write the Book of Woke?

And do you have faith in lefty Folk?

If Progressives tell you so

Do you believe in DEI?

Can equity get you a bye?

And can you teach inclusion with a sigh?

So bye-bye DEE EEE EYE

Drove my EV to the charger

But the charger was fried

Them good old indoctrinator lies

Singing, "Without DEI we’ll all die"

Without DEI we’ll all die

And while Lenin read a book of Marx

The Wokesters practiced in the park

And we sang dirges in the dark

The day DEI died

So bye-bye DEE EEE EYE

Drove my EV to the charger

But the charger was fried

Them good old indoctrinator lies

Singing, "Without DEI we’ll all die"

Without DEI we’ll all die

'Cause the divas tried to take the field

The marching band refused to yield

Do you recall what was revealed

The day DEI died?

So bye-bye DEE EEE EYE

Drove my EV to the charger

But the charger was fried

Them good old indoctrinator lies

Singing, "Without DEI we’ll all die"

Without DEI we’ll all die

Oh, and there we were all in one place

All genders lost in space

With no time left to start again

So come on, trans be nimble, trans be quick

Gender affirming surgery for the sick

'Cause fire is the devil's only friend

Oh, and as I watched him on the stage

My hands were clenched in fists of rage

No angel born in Hell

Could break that Satan's spell

And as the flames climbed high into the night

To light the sacrificial rite

I saw Satan laughing with delight

The day DEI died

So bye-bye DEE EEE EYE

Drove my EV to the charger

But the charger was fried

Them good old indoctrinator lies

Singing, "Without DEI we’ll all die"

Without DEI we’ll all die

Jon Reisman is an economist and policy analyst who retired from the University of Maine at Machias after 38 years. He resides on Cathance Lake in Cooper, where he is a Selectman and a Statler and Waldorf intern. Mr. Reisman’s views are his own and he welcomes comments as letters to the editor here, or to him directly via email at [email protected].